Picture the worst hump day you can imagine. A Wednesday straight out of hell. Trains are delayed, boss keeps giving it to you, you tried a new lunch spot instead of getting the same thing you always get and it was a huge letdown.
The rain starts pouring down around 5:05pm and you know the commute home will be awful, do you go home No! You head to Ashfield bowling club, literally a shining beacon of comfort and light on a dark and cold night.
The bowlo is warm and well appointed, plenty of seats and plenty of friendly staff. You get a VB on on tap because you are an Australian hero.
About two beers in and you feel like some pub grub so you grab a menu and have squizz. Plenty of menu options with all your favourites, heaps of gravy, chips are chunky, crispy and salty (i.e. perfect).
You decide against getting the parmi because your mum was half listening to the Dr Norman Swan podcast the other day and with no scientific backing has decided she's off cheese (and so are you) so you choose a burger instead.
Expecting the lean beef tower of Pisa you are pleasantly surprised. Much like yourself going through puberty this burger is wide not tall! A true pub burger, not stacked to the gills with cod knows what fancy American burger accoutrements but simple lettuce, tomato, onion, sauce and meat. And it all comes together into a delicious, almost religious, experience.
You finish your burger and are about to leave when you're stunned like a roo in headlights. The music starts up and you prepare your "thank you" speech. But calm down friend! This isnt the Oscars, this is a real night of nights, Wednesday pub trivia. People are handing out booklets and pens like it's going out of style.
After picking your two double points rounds and picking a terrible, awful, no good trivia name you start to listen to the questions. Unlike you job where you're at times a bit slow, occasionally incompetent or downright criminally negligent - at pub trivia you're a genius! A god. The god of knowledge, and beer.
You knowledge runs so deep you come third, snagging yourself a $20 voucher and a tacit expectation that you will be back at trivia the next week to do it all again with the new friends you've made. Maybe you'll bring some friends next week instead of drinking alone like some kind of BuzzFeed 'article' writer.
